Resolution for new year..

As 2009 is coming to a close, everyone and everywhere I hear/read the word-resolution. I am kinda of person who likes to make resolutions every year. The sad part is if I fail or deviate a little somewhere down the year and I feel so irritated and angry over myself of not being able to keep up my resolutions. (I assume everyone gets into this loop!!).
I was speaking about this to my close family circle and was trying to get some inputs to identify the secret receipe to realize resolutions without getting into self-criticism/self-aversion mode. One of the resolutions I got from my close circle was "To keep up with our resolution" will be one of our resolutions! ;). Though it sounds funny,I think its a fairly complicated task and it needs to be done on a daily basis to see if you are on track.

In this regard, I got an email from my father about resolutions. I am not sure on the source of this article , but its a good one. Do spend some time for yourself to read this article and do this exercise. I have tried doing the below, I shall keep it a little private for now ;)

Reproduced Article on Resolution
Don’t worry about resolutions, think about who you are at your best.
1)Who are the people who bring out the best in you? Why? How are you when you are at your best? Are you passionate, are you smarter? Are you more fulfilled?
2)Think about “who” you want to be and what it mean to become that.
3) Then every day while you are in the shower (assuming you bathe), think about being you at your best for the whole day and what you will accomplish. When 2011 comes around, you will
astound yourself at the greater person you have become...

May your 2010 be the first year of your even greater identity.

Happy new year to all.

Cheers
Shuba
:)

Chennaiyil Thiruvaiyaaru

Its music season in Chennai and margazhi maasam (Tamil month of Dec) is the most happening month for Indian dance and music lovers all over the world. During my school days, I use to wonder how can one sit for more than 2 hours in a concert and listen to alabanai and thanniavarthanams with mostly non-tamil based carnatic songs. But, over the years, I have developed some liking towards carnatic music(thanks to my amma for inculcating that) . This year got an oppurtunity to listen to Dr. Nithyashree Mahadevan (Grand daughter of legendary carnatic vocalist D.K.Pattammal) in "kamaraj memorial hall" in Chennai. It was a mesmerizing performance from Dr.Nithyashree. I like her for also singing tamil renditions while most carnatic singers sing mostly sanskrit/telugu/kannada keerthanai's(which i dont understand the meaning!).

Another myth I had about "kathakalakshepam" (art of story telling weaving together music in concert-discourse format) was,its meant for elderly people and the people who render would also be in late 40's or 50's was broken by Smt.VishakaHari . Got a chance to listen to her "Rama Nama Prabhavam) along with my husband, inlaws and father. "She is a CA gold medalist ,young , beautiful lady ,in 9-yards silk saree and gives a splendid performance", these are some of the info myself and my husband got to know about her. It made us more inquisitive to give a try for her kathakalakshepam(for my husband, its same profession feeling i suppose!! ;))
We were very much happy to have got a chance to listen to her discourse(Thanks to my appa for gettin tickets for both the conerts). She has done lot of reading to obtain this profound knowledge on the chosen topic. She explains the meaning of the songs soo well that I have become a big fan of her(My perception is to appreciate the song one should understand the meaning of the song). There is no doubt that she is taking this art form of story telling to our young generation as well with her enthralling voice and dramatic narration. The crux of the "RamaNama Prabhavam" kathakalakshepam was to keep chanting your favourite GOD's name(namam) wherever/whenever practically possible. It would have a profound impact on your way of life. We younger generation always requires proof to believe or accept anything. She quoted examples of certain great people's lives like "Valmiki" etc to prove the same. She did mention that its scientificially proved that "Aura" of a person was different after chanting "GOD's" name. Though the discourse title was "RamaNama" , she says depending on the religion/belief of an individual, he/she can chant any name which they believe and see the impact.

Blogging after a long time...

There has been quite a bit of developments in my personal front since my last post. I have moved back to Chennai since Aug,09. Its been a mixed feeling about moving back to the same place where I studied and started my career , being back to be close to my father. There were things like getting adjusted to crowd ,traffic, pollution etc having lived in a little more sophisticated, clean/greener city like singapore. I am quite happy about being close to my father and that too staying for about 4 months with him along with my husband after moving back from singapore.
There has been a very sad event in my life of losing my 4 month old foetus in November,though we had taken too much care and I had been on lot of medicines.... I was not very optimistic about my sister's doctor (whom we consulted initially) and being put into lot of medications since the beginning of pregnancy. I always felt that medicines should be to the minimum and wanted to have peaceful walks, active lifestyle etc for my pregnancy. As things didnt go as imagined, I think, I was disappointed and those negative thoughts had yielded in this or should I say family history is repeating! I dont understand why this happened and dont want to overanalyze. But, I am trying to accept this harsh reality. Its another major setback after my mother's loss. I am not sure when I would beget a child again. Hope and pray that it would be sooon. I am consoling myself thinking about my friend in singapore, who lost her 4 yr old boy ,her parents and sister all in a car accident..
I am a little confused on whats the next thing to do..! Idle mind is devil's workshop..
When I was working and managing everything in Singapore all by myself, without any domestic support, I was feeling that I deserve a good break from work and enjoy life by being a housewife for sometime and learn some new skills like baking etc and infact wanted to explore something very different than SW. line like montessori , teaching etc.

This incident has made me get into a retrospection mode on what I think is important in life..

Currently I am completely on rest with good domestic support (be it a domestic helper or inlaws to take care of all household stuff), I am very desperate feel I want to join back work!! Its contradicting feelings running in my mind.

I am not sure what is the best thing I need to do at this time.. I have started to explore job oppurtunities ,but still corner of my heart/mind prefers to take things a light...! I am not sure whats in store for me... Lets see, time will be the best answer. I shall keep you posted on small things thats happening in my life...

Bye 2009...wish & pray 2010 is a better, happy one for all of us...

Shuba
:)